bluesky

今天是2007年5月20日，同济大学的百年华诞。同济大学成立于1907年，六次迁校，经历了一个世纪的风风雨雨仍然能傲立于现代大学之林中，实在是难能可贵，这也正是“同舟共济，自强不息”的同济精神之所在。这一天对于25万同济学子来说都是一个特别的日子，因为学校保留着他们的回忆，也承载着他们的希望。对于我们5万在校生，这是一个激动人心的时刻。可是我却没有融入这个氛围中去。

在上个学期我曾经代表学院报名参加学校百年校庆形象大使，可是我那龌龊的表现让我直接被踢出门外。后来又有百年校庆志愿者活动，我也还是厚着脸皮报名了。当然志愿者是不会被刷下来的，不然那我真的要去找块豆腐撞撞了。

学校的百年校庆系列活动是从今年一月份开始。记得一月份在校门口曾经举行过百年校庆系列活动开幕式，在后面几天毛主席像前面也曾经公布了系列活动列表，但是每次路过校门的时候我都没有仔细的看过。

很久就经常听其他学院的志愿者已经搞过了志愿者培训，然后他们还去了嘉定校区观看“五月的鲜花”全国大学生文艺表演，可是我们学院却迟迟没有任何活动。学院的志愿者活动却是从前两天才开始的，让我又有一种专业歧视的感觉了。你们等着哈，大飞机的项目应该就有一部分项目可能就在我们学院，国家投资600多亿，眼红死你们。

这两天我和班上一直在彰武路校区接待校友，我负责给捐赠的校友开收据。第一天，安排接待的是原来老航校（以前的一所大专）的校友。本来是一项捐赠，起捐是50，结果不知不觉中在校友的捐赠中传成了50元购买纪念品。无语啊！这天过来的校友都已经比较老了，出手也并不阔气。

今天是接待咱们力学系的校友（我们是飞行器的第一届，所以还没有校友）。因为今天学校的主要接待地点设置在力学实验室，所以来彰武路校区的人是少之又少。一上午我就那边就没开张啊，到下午的时候就回本部了。

下午在本部也算是逛了一圈，终于是人头蹿动了。正门的停车场已经容不下行人了，校门口的花坛前面有好几班校友在留影，纪念品发放和购买区域也是排着长长的队伍，真可谓车水马龙啊。在百年校庆纪念邮票购买地点逛了一圈，觉得应该买一个留个纪念就叫室友的女朋友买一份，结果她排了两个小时的对，等来的却是已售完的消息（限量版）。

前天我哥问我导师联系好了没，那时我可真楞住了。不久前，我一直在提醒自己要抓住机会，可是总是给自己找了各种借口，一直在拖延。这几天接触了不少人和事，深感自己的不足，甚至开始恨自己的无知。昨天晚上又是一个不眠之夜，我翻来覆去的反省着这几年的大学生活。说实在的，大学生活我算是白过了。我的大学生活里没有社团，没有学生会，没有实习，没有兼职，而在学习上面也没有让自己满意的成果。看着别人都能够很好的融人这个充满活力的校园，我内心的失落和油然而生。那时侯我真的很想回家，因为在爸妈身边总是没有烦恼。我给他们俩发了两条短信，没想到是妈妈居然还没睡（估计又是在打牌了），她告诉我“男儿志在四方，不要想家”。我哭了，我的志在哪，我又为它付出了多少努力。想了一个晚上，最后还是决定“吾日三省其身”，希望这个能帮我走向成功。

All will pass and tomorrow is another day!

Its long ago when I updated the space last time, and back I come now. So many things have had taken their place but I just have no passion to write something to memorize. Last week, something special for me happened and I made great decision to note down my sentiment. However, when I opened the internet explorer, I just cannot place myself on that condition, and I gave it up again. This afternoon I browsed one of my friend’s space, and the impulsion came back.

Last week, I had a quarrel with her. There was nothing offending between us but I just could not behave as nothing had happened, and that’s the matter. She just could not tolerate my unreasonable gloominess and buzzed off immediately. When I tried to get through later, the line was always being busy and I realized something had happened.

That midnight, I finally get through. When I heard her quavery voice, I was aware of that she had a period of hard time just before, and I was too foolish to find out the causation. After some time’s cose, I finally figured it out. She is a few months older than I am and she is to graduate this term but I have another three years to go. She just felt perplexed for the X I gave her and the only thing I could give her. Women are always being realistic and that is no doubt she came up with this discomposure. When such things came across my mind, I just chose to escape from the reality. Our future is too noncommittal for me to give her a specific promise. I almost abandoned before receiving her message. We came at that conclusion to give each other another or two years, expecting a favourable turn will come forth ultimately.

The next day, she made a phone call to me. She asked me not to quarrel with her any more, and this stroke my bottom heart. I realize its ponderance and the affliction it conveys. I will do my best and try me please.

This term I immerse myself in the library to make me fully prepared for the graduation. I find so many curriculums to learn for I used to  skip the class in hte past two years and it seems I am running out of time. Persist and finally comes the success!

Another few days have elapsed since last updating. Life seems to be a little dull these days, nothing to memorize, nothing to celebrate, even nothing to regret.

Last Saturday, I told my mother that I wanted my handset back. You know, I was separated from friends since last Oct, and I am in what a great need to get one piece. She accepted my request at last but refused to give me money. Um, it’s not a bad start and I’ll figure it out.

Oh, Jesus, I almost missed one thing. Today I checked my account on the internet and I got ￥256 without rhyme or reason. This makes me tickled, eager to spend but afraid that it will be confiscated some day. Maybe I should buy a pair of glasses or contact lens for the glasses I wear now is the pair I wore when senior grade two and the current contact lens’s period of validity is one year and the doctor told me to use monthly-deserted. Above is just a presupposition but who knows how I will deal with it.

Some of my classmates are crazy of building their body and I join them in the queue. Every Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday, we went to the gym and spend about one hour in it. Haha, stick to, and I will achieve my goal—muscle man.

Cancer and Scorpio enjoy buying things together and creating a comfortable living space: Cancer craves security and Scorpio strives for power. Both occupy their minds with thoughts of domestic goods and resources, including stocks, bonds and inheritances. Since they are both concerned with the home and have fierce loyalties to the family group, Cancer and Scorpio complement each other well. They both see life as a passionate and deeply emotionally exercise of human connection.

The Moon (Emotion) rules Cancer, while Mars (Passion) and Pluto (Power) both rule Scorpio. Thanks to Pluto's powerful influence, this is an intense combination of Planets, but it's also a good balance of masculine and feminine energy. These two Signs coming together form the basic foundation of human relationships -- The Moon's nurturing love and Mars' ambition and passion. The Moon and Mars go well together; the Moon is about growth and rebirth, and Mars is about the passion of romance. Scorpio, influenced by that Martian energy, is smoldering and intense, and emotional Cancer is attracted to this intensity. In turn, Scorpio enjoys the adoration inherent to Moon-ruled, nurturing Cancer.

Cancer and Scorpio are both Water Signs. Both are very deep Signs and, like the ocean, you can never really see to the bottom of these two. Scorpio and Cancer may draw further and further into themselves, then suddenly roar back with intimidating force. Loyalty is strong with this love match, thanks to their mutual desire for emotional security. But while Cancer fixes their emotional energy on the family and home, Scorpio focuses more on life's nuances and undertones, the secrets behind other's intentions, the power they can wield over other's emotions. Scorpio can take Cancer on a journey beyond the literal surface of things, and Cancer's expansive heart can open Scorpio up to their own emotions, teaching their Scorpio mate that feeling is nothing to fear. Additionally, Scorpio appreciates their Cancer mate's practicality, and Cancer really enjoys Scorpio's jealousy -- it proves that Scorpio really loves and cherishes them.

Cancer is a Cardinal Sign, and Scorpio is a Fixed Sign. Once this couple have a common wish, it will come true. However, if their opinions clash, look out! Cancer will be the first to instigate an argument and Scorpio the last to finish it. Cancer may seem to act as the dominant partner and manage to get their way more often, but that isn't always the truth. Sometimes Scorpio won't even agree to disagree, they just might pretend to give in. Neither Cancer nor Scorpio are beyond using emotional manipulation to get revenge. Rather than letting disagreements and bad feelings boil over, these love partners must discuss what's truly important to them in order to reach an equitable compromise. Once Scorpio and Cancer learn to trust and believe in one another, they can achieve almost anything through sheer determination. This love relationship will only fail if the two partners truly cannot overcome their opinionated, stubborn sides.

What's the best thing about the Cancer-Scorpio love match? Their powerful teamwork when they agree on their goals. When Cancer realizes that Scorpio is there for the long haul and that the partnership is emotionally productive, this relationship can blossom. Their mutual determination makes theirs a relationship of formidable strength.

These days I was just star-crossed.

About ten days ago, I, accompanied by my roommate, ate outside in a restaurant called “麻辣烫”. It’s my first time to eat in that place so I just ordered something, which comprised some vegetables, two agglomerate of vermicellias and seafood, as my roommates did. We all three ordered 10 yuan but I just ate a little coz it tasted insipid with too much vermicellias but little soup. Furthermore, it was a little spicy. Which made things worse, was that after that day I had loose bowels for two days, with about 8 times a day. And on the third day, I went to see the doctor. The doctor asked me to have my dejecta checked. After turning over the report which founded blood corpuscle in my dejecta, the doctor asked me to have mainline for I was suspected to be infected by bacteria. You know, my constitution is very good and this is the first time to have mainline only because I ate something unhealthy.

The temperature fell drastically these days. I was unconformable with the transformation and caught cold by accident. What a bad luck!

This term, one of my roommates rent a house near the school and we often bought some beer and peanut on the way to his habitation. Last Saturday night, we bought some distilled spirit and we two out of three may probably drunk one bottle. It’s magical to be drunk and I just could not help falling down on to the bed when I was a little slantwise. And when comes to playing “跑跑卡丁车”, things seemed to be more fantastic for I could not control the direction and my car crashed here and there.

I concentrate my time and energy on the studying of the internet course as usual I felt immersed in it and the more I go deep into it, the more attractive it seems. As I have sign for the mechanics competition, maybe I should spend some time on mechanics in the following weeks.

This term I have too much to say about our teachers.

The electrician teacher is about 40 years, but she wears some kind of finery, a pair of ponytail as well, seems to be not aware of that or maybe pretends to be not that so old. Every class, she just asked us to weld this or that without telling any details, but when she checked what we’d done, she asked some question which she had never mentioned and used some standard we had never heard of. In addition, the way she gave the mark is so impenetrable. What she considered the most important is the speed but the knowledge you’ve got. Lousy! Clumsy she!

The mechanics teacher is also a middle-aged woman, but to be different from the woman I mentioned above, she dressed gracefully. She spoke a bad mandarin, “进给” as “jin gei”, “切屑” as “切削”. When comes to teaching, thing turns to be worse. She just read the book, exactly speaking, the powerpoint. U know, reading is easier than explanation, and she always finished the class faster than expected to. Time is to be filled, so she asked us read ourselves and gave some assignments that we used to do when child. Sod her!

The hydrodynamics teacher gave us a good impression on the first period. But he just took nearly one whole class to review what we had learned before, talking in a confused way, without anyone to get what he’d said. And also he can make simple questions complicated without your imagination. The most absurd thing he made is that he mistaken the reciprocal of density for “重度”, and never discovered until minutes passed. How the hell can he be a college teacher?

The aircraft-tectonics teacher is a professor. Somebody may think it is our great honor to have a professor to teach us. But everything has an exception and he is that one. He, surnamed ‘许振宇’, maybe is advanced in his research field but never a good teacher. His voice is so grave that it is also hypnotic. On his class, it’s impossible to keep level-headed. And like hydrodynamics teacher, he is not good at decipherment.

 

My girlfriend’s birthday is to come, but I just cannot figure out what to buy. Any suggestion?

晕啊,我应该没做什么缺德的事情吧,居然又被点拉,还要收点名费!便便,你要是不给我充饭卡,我跟你没玩!

1 要传出去的下六个人:得了吧,我上面就那么几个人

2 你的小名:多着呢,不过都是大学以前的,上大学后就没了

3 年龄:好无聊的题目

4 职业:哎

5 兴趣:

6 喜欢的异性类型:女朋友

7 专长/特技:犯贱

8 有没有什么证书:笑的最自然的人

9 有烦恼的事吗:多着了,需要对象宣泄啊!

10 喜欢和讨厌的食物:女朋友做的饭菜/西苑的饭菜

11 对你爱的人说一句:forever love(早知道前面就不提她了)

12 介绍你要传出去的6个人:

13 用一种动物来比喻传问卷给你的人:哈哈,这个题目我最喜欢,老公猪

14 用喜欢的角色比喻传问卷给你的人:可爱的大便

15 用食物来比喻传问卷给你的人:shit

16 用颜色来比喻将接棒的6人:……

p.s;大家不要再点我名了啊,我无条件投降

I’ve been suffering from bad quality of sleep since this term for the dorm administer doesn’t cut off the electricity night and this causes me to quit the habit of heading for bed as soon as 11. In addition, I have to get up at 7 everyday that I would never do before. Even on the weekends sleep is not enough. Everyday morning u can see a pair of big black eyes which is the badge of bad sleep. Fortunately, this won’t last forever and the electricity will be cut as usually it did since this 15^th. Today and tomorrow are the last two days and I really appreciate this chance to update my space in midnight though it brought me enough troubles.

U may know that I got a job as a family teacher from my classmate and today the boy I taught last term, called me to ask for teaching him for another term. And yesterday, the company, which I applied for a part-time job, got someone to hold a meeting with us and it is said that we would start a few days later. U know, so many things emerged surged at the same time and this makes me to feel a little bit depressed. But on the other hand, it’s certainly a great chance I really need and hope I can make it.

This night, actually speaking, yesterday night, we, members of the colony called“同济湘军” dine together in a little eatery near fudan university. We chatted in generalities and covered many aspects of our daily life. I got that if u wanted to be recommended for the admission to another university, generally better than ur own college, the only thing u have to do is to get in touch with the tutor whose subject u are in favor of and strive for his admission. I have been worried about the possibility of being recommended for the admission to Beihang University rather than our own school for it’s the first time our school opened this specialty and it doesn’t have a good fame outside. But now, I’m more confident about that and this enforced my determination and from now on, I’ll fight for this aim. So, come on, guys!

Today I browsed the space of one of my senior middle school classmates. And one passage attracted me and I pasted it bellow:

do you have a reason?(movie review 1: memento)

  most of us struggle to live, or just to survive, on this planet, enduring the boredom of life, suffering the affliction of diseases,  going through the loneliness of nights that never end, living with the regret that bites us continuously, or driven by rage that never fades in time... life is short and sometimes painful. it is even not so bad to feel the pain that tells us we are still alive. so, in this hollowness, what is there in this life to keep you struggling, enduring, and still moving ahead? meaninglessness is what has been defined by life itself. however, human beings are so smart to find two things to make their life less meaningless. they found love, and revenge.

  especially when  love happens to be the source of revenge, it kinda makes life so fulfilled. to pacify the dead wife, and to punish the brutal killer-the one who also makes the hero Leonard suffer the short-time memory loss, a condition that erases his memory back to the accident every ten minutes- Leo has got a road replete with lies, tears and agony ahead of him. By just taking notes and put the information in tattoo, Leo lives his life motivated by revenging. He starts his life with knowing his wife is dead every ten minutes, and deduces all over again to figure out who take the love of his life away. Love is what we intend to find and keep. However, the irony is that it is also the strong and exhoustable source of hatred. When there will be no new memory branded, what does it take to keep you holding on? Is it the endless love for past wife, or the hatred against who smashed it all? dont hasten to the conclusion, life is more trickery, or just simpler than it seems to be.

 The director is so smart to keep us in the circles of feeling how Leo feels. Telling the story in a exact reverse order, the director put you fittedly in the shoes of the hero. you know nothing about what happened before the scene you're watching, just like Leo did. Why am i here? What is these tatoos on my skin? My wife died? Find John Gammel! This is what Leo got to remember each 10 minutes, and this is what will keep him holding on through his whole life. Every one needs a reason to live on, a excuse to make us believing we are still in the world for something, even when sometimes this whole thing is a lie.

  I don't want to spoil the story here. Because i hope you guys see the most brilliant movie for yourselves. And then discuss it with me. But I want to tell you what this movie has told me. Everyone needs a reason to live on, love, hatred, desire, or whatsoever. whether we really believe in these or just keep on lying to ourselves, it doesn't matter. The thing is, we need a THING to keep us going on. What if you cant find one? Dont worry, every one can be the next John Gammel.

 The world doesn't just disappear when you close your eyes, does it?

 

Possibly, I can’t get what he said. But for me, we do have to live for some reason, even hatred will also make sense. Life is just for you, and you should choose whatever kind of goal that you think can keep u feel happy and worth your having a go in the world. Life is so simple that the only thing u have to do is make yourself happy even this will turn a disaster to someone else coz for you life is worth living. So find your John Gammel. Hoho!

Today is the National Day. Shanghai Art Gallery is on the 6^th Shanghai Biennale, and it’s said worthy of the money. So I, accompanied by one of my classmates, went to see it. This year’s motif is hyper design, for me, too nonrepresentational for me to understand. But, some pictures did draw my attention, and I also got the concept of creation and imagination. I pasted some on the spaces, and hope they will also intrigue u.

I’m in my twenties and an adolescent already, but I just can behave as an adult. I still do as how I did before and sometimes my behavior even seems to be childish. I think it is ashamed of me to be called as a boy and deemed to be cherubic when I am 20 already. But I just can’t behave as grow-ups and this makes me feel unnatural when communicating with others. Things come the same on my girlfriend. These days we had some little conflict. Nights came as usual and my hone for her also. But I just didn’t wanna call her coz I thought I should be a real man and real man will never indulge her always. So I tried not to contact her for two days. But when she called me on the third day, I just couldn’t be that cool and I behaved as nothing had happened. Maybe it’s the men’s weakness. I’m that kind of man can’t be disturbed, so it’s hard for me to think when talking. After buzzing off, I took sometime to recall some things. Though indulgence will make things worse, I think, I have to behave naturally and all men has to for nature is the most beautiful thing. Though I will be considered as a boy, innocence doesn’t mean infantility and is not a bad thing for itself. So to be myself but not to be babyish.

我这么善良,居然还是被点名了,晕啊,这么多题目,苦煞我也!

哼,i will always remember this day!

Q1：如何在心情低落的时候恢复积极呢？

发发闷气，过一阵也就过去了
 Q2：你心目中的理想伴侣是什么样的？(要提出标准哦)

善良就行，相貌了得在第一次见面是得到认可
 Q3：相比两年前，自己有什么变化？　

年龄大了两岁贝，还有胡子多了不少，记忆力下降，哈哈
 Q4：你目前面对的最大的难题是什么？

To control myself and to get along well with the people around
 Q5:  你有没有过厌恶自己的时候？为了什么？

有的拉，就是自己不会安慰一个人或者很浮躁的时候
 Q6：你希望怎样过这辈子?

Happy is the best thing to take into account, so to b happy
 Q7：你经历过的最伤心的事情是什么？

Too many things to mention
 Q8：你觉得时间真的能冲淡一切吗?

冲淡是显然可以的拉，但是忘记的话那就是另外一回事拉
 Q9： 上一次哭是什么时候…为什么….

7月18号，送女朋友去北京（晕啊，对我来说这个问题真够狠拉）
 Q10: 上次撒谎是为什么?

这个啊，我也不知道拉
 Q11：你认为男女之间存在真正的友谊么？

显然有拉,怎么想的啊??
 Q12：什么时候是最开心的时候？

When someone(including all my friends) is happy

 Q13：你最爱的人和第二爱的人是谁？

靠，这个还是不回答了吧，饶了我吧
 Q14：自己努力的没有结果，你会怎么平衡心理的落差？

不会有这样的情况了，另外既然自己努力了，当然就问心无愧拉
 Q15：你觉得点你名的人怎么样？

呵呵，强人拉，很喜欢拉
 Q16：你想收到什么生日礼物？

手表，衣服，鞋，啥都想要拉
 Q17：你相信猫和狗可以和平共处吗？

它们没有和平相处吗，狗不是怕猫么？这样就不是和平？
 Q18:  怎样才能把牛肉烧的很嫩？

我要知道的话，你敢吃我做的么？
 Q19:  请用四个字概括你对黎巴嫩局势和我国南方洪灾的看法?

乱七八糟
 Q20:  你在非常困但是又不能睡觉的时候，怎么办？

如果很重要的话，肯定就不睡不；不重要的话，不让我睡就是要我命
 Q22：你对冥王星的分类问题怎么看 ？

不关心拉
 Q23：觉得自己十年后在哪里？

棺材么？应该不会吧
 Q23：现在最想和谁在一起?

女朋友
 Q24：活着的目的是什么？

承担自己应该承担的责任
 Q25: 对结婚是什么看法？

没看法，只是觉得两个人长期生活在一块似乎很难
 Q26：你居住城市的房价有没有可能下跌？

有可能的拉，但是不是现在，得看国家的宏观调控
 Q27: 如果让你送给点你名的人一句话，你会说什么？

我要找个姐夫，然后开开心心过活哈哈
 Q28：除了做梦，怎样才能使梦想成真？

努力撒
 Q29：最近发现的好餐厅在那里？

有钱的话那就多着了
 Q30: 最近在看哪些书？推荐一两本？

航空电气，飞行器构造学，要看么？哈哈

Q31：你最喜欢的卡通角色？为什么？

These days, I always went to the library to study. And sometimes I feel a little tired and whiny after a few hours of learning, and then I got some magazines in the periodical room. U know, when in grade 2, I didn’t go to the library often, and it’s amazing for me to find so many kinds of useful books. And it is the same when comes to the science and technology room. I have let one year slip unconsciously, but it’s never too late for me coz I have another two years to make up for the loss.

After return from Beijing, she has got a job as a desk clerk in an economical hotel. It’s set to open a month later, and these days she has to sell member cards with her manager. It’s some kind of tiring job and she feels languid after walking a long ways everyday. But she says it is worthy doing for it’s her own choice and at the same time, she also takes it as a chance to be promoted.

Yesterday I got a job as a family teacher from my classmate coz he doesn’t have enough time. I’ve been searching for a job on the forum of my school but in vain. This term, I’m in greater need of money than the past ones and hope it will alleviate the tense of lack of money.

All my roommates, not only from college but senior middle school, know that I have a habit of dreaming at night, always with making some noise, speaking, howling as like. But as far as I remember, most of them turn out to be a nightmare. However, yesterday I had a great dream that I will always keep in mind coz not only it’s that kind of sweet dream but it feels especially real, just  like what I feel in reality and seems it would happen later in the real world.

Last night, my classmates and I played the “跑跑卡丁车” together till midnight and before bed, I asked “翁” to wake me up at seven this morning for I wanna take the minor course. As I went to bed late, it is hard for me to get up that early. So when he patted me as I told him to, I just opened my eyes and then fell asleep like always. When I came to my sense, it’s already 11 o’clock and the class had got its end.

To make up the time I’ve wasted, I went to the library after lunch. I took some time reviewing and preparing for the later class, then got an English magazine called “geographic”. In that book, I got a message that Alfred Russel Wallace, was a British naturalist, geographer, anthropologist and biologist. Wallace's independent proposal of a theory of evolution by natural election prompted Charles Darwin to reveal his own more developed and researched, but unpublished, theory sooner than he had intended. And I also learned about some famous adventure destinations. Though it is the first I read this kind of book, I think it’s worth reading and I will take some time to enjoy it.

Three days has passed since this term began. I cannot remember what I was doing during the first week of the past term, but what is certain is that I do did well in the past three days. Though I slept on the class as before, I concentrated myself on the class most of the time and I even took some notes at class. U know, I have been just sitting in the classroom without doing anything for years. And this is a great milestone for my attempt to the success.

I’ve been suffering from diarrhea for about 8 days. It’s afflictive and u have to shit couple of times a day and certainly I lost my weight. One of my classmates can even descry it at the first sight of seeing me without hesitation. I didn’t take it seriously until about 5 days had gone. Then I went to the school hospital and got some medicine as the doctor told me to. And I feel a litter better now, but I know today won’t be the end and it will last for another few days.

Tonight, I, coupled with my roommate, took the paper investment course. I’ve been eager to get some knowledge about this kind of subject and even longing for buying stock for a long period. U maybe cannot imagine how exciting I was when in class but the fact is that I do cherish this opportunity to approach the subject and arm myself with the knowledge which can be useful in the near future. Hey, man, stick to!

Somebody said that to love, it’s essential for u to indulge and be prepared to give up some times. It’s so called sacrifice. It’s also said on the day u have mercy on yourself, u should have known it has got its end and that is the base line of sacrifice.

But love, for itself, is not that kind of thing that can be controlled properly and u should not take too much consideration of how much I should pay out and what I can get from it. U should show ur strongest love to ur greatest extent. Once u have made great efforts to give whatever u can offer, u have get yourself an answer sheet. Or, one day, at the broke-up time, u’ll be regret what u have done coz maybe u can do more things to cultivate and maintain it.

She, of course, I mean my honey, has returned to Changsha after more than a month’s exercitation in Beijing. As she described, the exercitation in Beijing was tiresome and boring and it’s hard to bare. She and one of her roommates applied for the demission and the company also signed the application, so they returned home without any trouble. But one thing was missed when they were thinking of backing home. That is they returned home at the wrong time. You know, they occupy themselves in tourism and now is the off-season coz summer vacation is to get its ending and it’s a little bit hard for them to get a job as tourist guide. So they are turning to the hotel waiter again as they did in Beijing and other jobs. These days she is busy seeking for a suitable job and taking various interviews and I feel hard for her. But there is nothing I can do except collect want ad from the internet. Honey, come on, and you’ll get whatever you want.

Today a man about 30 years old who I met and smiled in the dinning room several days before asked for my phone number. I was confused by what he was saying and had no idea about what he was thinking of. I stood there without saying anything and then came another question. He said maybe we could have a chat some time at some place. Me, a little boy not knowing how to reject someone, accept his invitation. During the few seconds with him, I felt him like some kind of gay. Now time is coming and I decide not to turn up. Sorry!

This afternoon, I went to a supermarket nearby and bought a pair of sandbags. This term, I’ll keep running with sandbags tied to both of my legs not only for keeping health but improving bounce ability. In addition, I ‘ll also take some other kind of practice such as lifting the dumbbell, push-up. Hoho, to be a muscle man!

又是一个极度兴奋的晚上,已经是半夜11:30了,可是还是没有一点睡意.这个暑假这样的夜晚不知过了多少个,也不知道是什么原因,躺在床上翻来覆去就是睡不着.
晚上本来已经取了隐形眼镜准备睡觉的,想想有好久没有更新了,正好寝室另外一个夜猫子也要更新就一起写写东西吧.因为取了隐形之后不能立马带上去,于是就翻箱倒柜的找那断了两条腿的眼镜,找了半天也没找到(看不见啊),结果在桌子上找到一个眼镜盒,里面放着一副高二就没戴了的眼镜.于是跑到盥洗室的镜子前面戴上瞧了瞧……原来以前我戴这副眼镜就这个熊样啊,实在有点难以想象!不过好象不戴隐形眼镜要清楚点哦!
今天晚上她给我打电话了,告诉我她今天和主管吵了一架,说是明天要找人事部经理理论,如果经理也坚持主管的意见的话,就要离职回家.我知道她肯定是受了委屈.在那边的这一个月里,她似乎就没过几天开心的日子.她的脾气不好,心里有鳖不住那口气,老是弄得自己一点都不开心.而我在这个时候给她打电话的时候,就是说不出什么可以安慰她的话.我知道我应该说点好听的,那样的话她可能能消消气,可就是张不开口.我总是和她讲讲其他的事,希望能够转移她的注意力.但是她不吃这套,每次都只是让她更烦躁,最后甚至是她"啪"的一声挂我电话了.我知道,她们的实习是在老师的谎言中开始的,那样的工作也不是她喜欢的,她在那边也没少受苦,但是我总是觉得不应该就这样结束.我不是个理智的人,不会以理性的思维去分析,但是我还是有直觉的!我想那些烦心的事情也有不少一部分是她自己造成的.因为她始终有点放不开,心里始终没有做到"既来之,则安之",还在挂念要是没有在这边工作就好了,对这份工作也始终报着一种抵触态度.这让她的叛逆情绪占了上风,让她看不惯一些事情,心情当然也好不到哪去!
然而每次当她不高兴的时候,我却总是像个傻子一样的静静的听着,到我开口的时候也不知道说什么.我觉得我作为男朋友,在她失落的时候来安慰她是我最基本的职责,可是我却做不到,这让我很自责.那个时候我宁愿自己没有听到,这样我或许还可以心安理得的过日子(她没告诉我嘛!).我觉得别人在这个方面肯定可以处理的很好的,可是什么事情到我身上去是另外一回事了呢?为什么我却做不到了?每每这个时候我都会询问自己,也曾问过不少人,可一直没有答案.或许这不能强求,或许这是由我的性格决定的,但是我不想这样,我要有我作为她男朋友存在的意义!so who can tell me why?
今天哥哥给我打电话了,问我是不是缺钱用.我知道肯定是妈妈打电话给他了,因为我前两天打电话回家要钱了.家里条件并不怎么样,准确点说应该说是比较差吧.这些我都知道,也曾无数次提醒自己要节约用钱,每次打完电话回家后也都是信誓旦旦,但钱还是从手指缝中流走了!哥哥都已经23岁了,应该也要有自己的生活了,我不想因为家里还有个读书乱花钱的弟弟而耽误了他的事,所以我总是先打电话回家,确认家里那边拿不到钱的时候再找哥哥,哥哥每次也都是尽可能的满足了我.我有两个还在读书的同学都开过那种小辅导班了,还有一个还成为了某所学校的老师.我也曾试过在学校的网站搜索自己合适的兼职,但是就是没找到，或者说是自己不敢尝试咯.难道这个学期还得做家教么?实在不想啊,但是又可以做什么呢?
这个学期准备好好学习,另外还想把网络工程师给考了,可能的话在学学cad,pro/e,或者网页设计什么的,希望能够说到做到咯.呵呵,"hope for the best and prepare for the worst"!

昨天晚上寝室的风扇坏了,因为怕睡着出一身汗,就问隔壁寝室的借了个小风扇,放在床头的桌子上.哪知道因为对着头吹了一个晚上,今天早上起来就动不了拉.本来感冒就身体已经够沉的了,结果还加上了前天锻炼过度,身体的各个部分都酸痛,手臂估计还是肌肉拉伤.哎,有得受了!!

时间:2006年7月18日20:56分

地点:长沙火车站

人物:我和她

火车已经启动,开始发出"哒哒"的声音.坐在车窗旁边的她一边擦拭着脸上的泪水,一边向我挥手告别.站在车窗外面的我,慢慢的跟随着火车的速度.渐渐地,她已经在视野中消失.于是,我加快了脚步,开始小跑起来,终于又看到了她,便傻傻的笑了,她也笑了.就这样,我再一次记住了她的笑容!

 

走过长沙熟悉的街头,脑海中总是浮现出以前的一些影子.长沙似乎保存着我和她所有的回忆,我们曾经一起逛街,一起逛超市,一起买菜,一起做菜……或许是因为以前的分别都是我要离开长沙,而惟独这次是她离开长沙,所以以前的分别过一两天就能晃过神来,这次却那么的难熬!她离开长沙已经有好几天了,可是总感觉她还留在长沙,而我的内心却正好抓住这个借口,想象着不久后的相遇……

 

离开长沙火车站,又踏上了返校"征途".哎,这"征途"用得一点也不假啊,坐了这么多趟火车,就没有一趟轻松点的,没上火车就开始起疙瘩啊!我坐在窗前,外面却没有她的影子,心中有点阴影飘过.5:08分,火车准时启动.别了,长沙!没有了她,你也就没有那么值得留念!